ISIS: Pitiful Hackers

ISIS truly lacks the sophistication and intelligence to do anything but hack bodies. Without the guidance and supply of other forces such as the US, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Qatar…etc, this barbaric, rag-tag bunch of degenerate, Islamic outcasts would still be fighting with sticks-and-stones, and running from their victorious enemies dressed as women (as they have shown).

However, as if escaping soldiers dressed as women wasn’t pitiful enough, these barbaric stooges actually made a claim to have hacked Google. According to Newsweek these nincompoops known as the Caliphate Cyber Army(CCA) stated:

“We promised to hack Google,” a message that was posted to a Telegram channel used by the CCA reportedly stated. “Keep the promise inshallah [God willing], expect us today.”

Well it seems as Allah played a cruel joke on them, twice! Firstly, they thought some tiny Indian SEO company know as Add Google Online was actually a part of the monolithic Google itself. Then as they did manage to exploit this runt of an organization, the ISIS CCA was foiled smartly by a real hacking group going by n3far1ous. The CCA must have donned their dresses when n3far1ous hit the same Indian site, leaving behind the message “Eat this, ISIS” along with an energetic rock melody.

While IS has been successful in using online technologies to promote its cause, the achievement of its alleged hackers are less striking. (source)


Personally I see this as the understatement of the year. Teen-aged, American children have more technological finesse than these dirty desert rats will ever have.

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